Arms down, head back, and hold on!

I know that EVERYONE and their mother, brother, sister, father, cousins, uncles and aunts say this...but I just can't seem to wrap my brain around how FAST time is moving.
I'm 29-almost 30...first of all...WHAT?????? This cannot be.
Almost 11 years ago I graduated from highschool
Almost 8 years ago I graduated from college
Exactly 3 years ago I graduated from Graduate School
2 1/2 years ago I came to Longview--this is what seems the craziest. I can't believe that it's been 2 1/2 years already and that I'm in the home stretch of my time here.
Thanksgiving came and went, Christmas is almost here and once the New Year comes I can just see my life moving is super fast motion...
...kind of like this amazing roller coaster ride at my favorite amusement park, Cedar Point, in Sandusky Ohio: Top Thrill Dragster. You hop in the car, anticipating the ride, and hear the man in blue, holding on to his walkie like it's his trophy, calls out..."Keep your arms down, head back and hold on! Enjoy the ride here at Cedar Point, America's. roller. coast." And boom...you're off at 120 mph right from the start; head plastered to the headrest, and your face feels like it's getting the most intense face lift ever and you climb to 420 feet in about 4 seconds, and 13 seconds later, the ride is over....yes, this is kind of what I anticipate January-August to be for me...before I leave the country and begin a whole new life.
"Keep your arms down, head back and hold on! Enjoy the ride..."

Morning glory

One of my favorite things is waking up in the morning and feeling like I got enough rest and God is the first thing on my mind. I open my eyes and welcome the day, and have my first thoughts be to pray and ask God to help me order my day, and to empower me to accomplish all that He wants for me. This happened this morning.

Most times I drag my very weary self out of bed because mornings and I just don't get along...and my bed and I have become pretty good friends-so welcoming and comfortable with Egyptian cotton sheets. Who wants to get out of bed when you sleep on Egyptian cotton sheets?! Ah, but alas this morning was glorious and serene as I awoke in peace. I really hope that this becomes the normal description of my mornings.

And now with Coffee in hand and knowing God is with me today I am anticipating what God will show me today and how I might be able to minister to someone in Jesus' name.

Bring on your ministry God, I'm ready!

Tune in to a different frequency

I've been thinking about the last 7 years of my life and I've realized that so much of my time has been about waiting. Waiting for the dream that God put inside me to come to fruition. Waiting for desires to be fulfilled as I've sought after the Lord. And because I've come to realize how much of my time has been spent in the season of waiting, I'm wondering if there is something supernatural that occurs in this season because God orchestrates events in the lives of His people that cause them to wait. It's as if we can only know parts of God's character and truly encounter something supernatural with God in the midst of waiting. Let's think about what God says about waiting...

Psalm 27:14 "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

Psalm 33:20 "We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help and our shield."

Psalm 37:7 "Be still before the Lord and patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes."

Psalm 37:34 "Wait for the Lord and keep his way; He will exalt you to inherit the land."

Psalm 40:1 "I waited patiently for the Lord;He turned to me and heard my cry."

Psalm 130:6 "My soul waits for the Lord, more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchman wait for the morning."

Proverbs 8:34 "Blessed is the man who listens to me,watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway."

Isaiah 30:18 "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him."

Isaiah 38:13 "I waited patiently till dawn; but like a lion he broke all of my bones;day and night you made an end to me."

Isaiah 51:5 "My righteousness draws near speedily, my salvation is on the way,and my arm will bring justice to the nations.The islands will look to me and wait in hope for my arm."

Lamentations 3:24 "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."
Micah 7:7 "But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord; I wait for God my Savior, my God will hear me."

John 3:29 "The bride belongs to the bridegroom.The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom's voice."

Acts 1:4 "Do not leave Jerusalem, but wait for the gift my Father promised, which you have heard me speak about."

Romans 8:25 "But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently."

1 Cor. 1:7 "Therefore you do not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for the Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed."

James 5:7 "Be patient then brothers as you wait for the Lord's coming. SEe how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains."

Jude 1:21 "Keep yourself in God's love as you wait for the mercy of the Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life."

Sometimes I think that when we wait we don't exactly know what we are waiting for, we're just waiting because nothing has happened yet. But according to these verses, we are supposed to wait for the Lord-we aren't supposed to wait for a situation to change, but there seems to be something that God does when we wait for him, HE shows up and an interaction occurs.
A good friend of mine told me that when we wait on the Lord, it isn't that we are waiting in silence, but that there are a lot of different sounds in the waiting room, just on a different frequency, we have to tune into the supernatural frequency that God Himself is communicating on.
Sometimes waiting feels like God is just sitting on His throne, hearing my cry. But He just sits there. And I am convinced now that is a wrong perspective, because these verses speak that when we wait, God acts. When we wait, God can make things happen in the heavens, He rises with Compassion, He righteously judges, He makes things happen.
I think that is why He often orchestrates events in which His people have to wait, because HE wants to do it, He wants to show His saving arm. Just look at Abraham. God caused Sarah to be barren so that they would have to wait and see the salvation and the purpose of God come down upon them. It was HIS mighty hand. And we see what happened when they got tired of waiting, and lost hope in God's ability to act, and in His desire to do so.
So, as I sit in this waiting room...God isn't passively sitting by watching me wait, but when I pray He rises, whey I cry out in frustration He walks, when I exalt Him He shakes the heavens and His glory is revealed. Those are of the supernatural, and I get to take part in that.
What I'm needing in my current situation is to sense that "God is on the move" to accomplish His purposes for my life.
Waiting is hard. Giving up dreams is hard. Seeing that the future might look different than what I expect is hard: accepting that seems almost impossible. But is God faithful? yes! Is He ever out of control? No. I must hold on to His unchangeable character in the midst of uncertainty.

Grace Flows Down

Last night I was talking with my brother-in-law, sharing the good news of my consecration interview with him and exclaiming, "I had so much fun in there!" He laughed and said, "wow, that isn't usually the response that I hear from people who go through the ordination/consecration process..." And this comment is all too true.
I have been in interviews like this before, I went through one to become a candidate for International Ministries, and I remember feeling intimidated. And it was hard to just "relax" and express what is truly in your mind and heart when you feel the "pressure to perform." But this time, it was far different.

The difference...prayer.Absolutely. I had a great support team interceding for me here in longview and around the country and even overseas! How beautiful. But also before I went into this I went before the Lord and I said, "Jesus, I am not going in there unless you go before and stand with me. It's you and me. Let's go." Peace consumed me. In the presence of the Lord there is fullness of joy. I loved sitting in that room with these men sharing what I believe about the Lord and happily referring to scriptures that have been etched on my heart (partly due to 7 years of Bible Quizzing-being drilled on scripture-thank you Tom and Jim!) since I was a little girl.
There was a seriousness to the interview, but we were able to laugh and make jokes together as well. And later they expressed their thanks for the enjoyment they had, often it can be stressful for them as well...so they welcomed the refreshing time that we all had together.

After all the questioning was over, they called me back in to welcome me into the family of the Southwestern district as a fully consecrated and approved woman in the ministry. Then they gathered around me to pray over me. And something changed in that moment-I can't explain it, but I sense something has happened in my spirit-like God has just added me as a pillar in the house of the Lord and that is so humbling to consider.

His Grace flows down and covers me.

An appointed Time for Everything

So, as you can see, I am making some changes to my blog. There are several reasons for these changes...

1. I like to change things around-in some things I am a creature of habit, but in others I really enjoy adding new dimensions. This is one of those, and I get to put my creativity to good use, so this is my outlet!

2. I am heading into some unknown times...for example: How much longer will I be in Longview, TX? Is this the year that transitions me to international work? If so, what country am I being prepared for? What exactly will I be doing? If not, what does God have up his sleeve for me? (And some of the more honest questions being:God, how much longer are you going to make me wait for the fulfillment of the vision & desire YOU put in me????? How many more doors will be closed before the right one opens up? Could you at least open a window so I can get a glimpse of what is ahead? Please?")-Come on folks, let's be honest...we all have questions deep down just like this, don't we? ;)

3. And it is these questions that propelled me to change the name of my blog from Skies of Texas to Paths Uncharted. I don't know what lies ahead of me, and how bumpy the road may be, if there will be anyone else on that journey with me or if I'll have to continue to walk it alone, what valleys or mountains I may experience as I go, or who I will become in the process. The road ahead is uncharted. It's territory I've never walked before. But even though it's never been walked by me, the way has already been made straight by my Father. He has gone before me to make my way straight in the wilderness, and no matter if I am alone or not, He promises always to be by my side and my rear guard. I just need to trust him with all of my heart and not give in to the temptation to lean on what my mind understands or doesn't understand. His ways are higher than mine as are His thoughts.

All of this reminds me of a verse God gave me for leading worship this past Sunday:

"Thus says the Lord,
Cursed is the man who trusts in mankind and makes flesh His strength, and whose heart turns away from the Lord.
For he will be like a bush in the desert and will not see when prosperity comes
But will live in stony wastes in the wilderness; a land of salt without inhabitant.

But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, and whose trust IS the Lord
For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by a stream
and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit."
_Jeremiah 17:5-8

Wow, as I write it I realize how much this verse pertains to me in the current state of my heart and mind. I long to be the latter; may it never be that I take the way of the cursed man.

As the psalmist prays, so I pray:
"Lord, when you said 'Seek my face', my heart said to you O Lord, 'Your face I shall seek...teach me Your way O Lord, and lead me in a level path." ~Psalm 27:8,11

The Living Room of Sweet Communion

Living Room of Sweet Communion
By Summer Hartzler
May 10th, 2010


Verse One
The bridegroom/ yearns for his bride
He says “Beloved/ You are mine”
(Song of Solomon 2:16)
He asks why
Have you forsaken me?
The Spring that gives you living water
(Jeremiah 2:13)

Verse Two
The bridegroom/ stands at her door
(Revelation 3:20)
“Beloved/ I want you to know me more”
Hear my voice
(Revelation 3:22)
I hold the keys to your heart
Will you dine with me
in the living room of sweet communion?
(Revelation 3:20)

Chorus 1
She will/ over come
And I’ll give the right to eat
Of the tree of life
That is found in
The paradise of God
(Revelation 2:7)

Verse Three
The bridegroom/ walks toward His bride
Beloved I have come/ to your side
He ask why
Have you eaten of the food
That won’t satisfy?
(Isaiah 55:2)
For I am
The bread that gives eternal life
(John 6:35)

Chorus 2
She will/ overcome
I will give to her/ the morning star
(Revelation 22:16; 2:28)
She’ll have a new name
Written on a stone
(Revelation 2:17)
She’ll be found in
The paradise of God

Verse Four
The beautiful bride responds/ to her groom
She takes His hand and says/I am ready now
(Revelation19:7)
She looks at Him with love
And He declares to her
I will/betroth you in righteousness
I will/forever in faithfulness
(Hosea 2:19)
And I will dine with you
In the living room of sweet communion
Revelation 3:20)

Chorus 3
She has/ overcome
Has prepared herself for me
With fine linen bright and clean
(Revelation19:7-8)
I will/ make her
A pillar in the house
In the temple of the Lord
(Revelation3:12)
Beloved/ I am coming soon
(Revelation22:12)

She has/overcome
I gave the right to eat
Of the tree of life
She is found in
The paradise of God

She’ll have a new name
Written on a stone

And beloved
I am coming soon.

We've only just begun...

This morning when i arrived at the office I spent some time in prayer. I was praying over the whole situation with the decision that I need to make, again submitting it to the Father. I was also praying that Jesus would be sovereign over the decision, and over the leadership, that my leaders would look to Jesus for His will concerning my partnership with the C&MA. As I was praying this image came to my mind: my director was sitting on at his desk talking on the phone to me and behind him stood Jesus...he was towering over my director as if to emphasize His authority, His sovereignty. It again encouraged me and solidified to me how involved the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are in this whole process.

I could go into so much detail concerning how the conversation went this morning, but I'll try to keep it simple.
I have decided to continue moving forward with the C&MA. I will be pursuing the possibilities that are in front of me with these countries, talking with the regional leaders about vision but also sharing with them what I know is on my heart for ministry. As we move along in this, if there is any time when i am sensing God leading me in a different direction we will be able to reassess things and determine what to do at that point. They desire to see the will of God completed in my life and if it means that He takes me in a different direction than what I'm pursuing now they are 100% supportive.

I also discussed with him the confirmation I have sensed God strongly give to me to pursue intercession and growing in my experience of it through guidance and teaching from seasoned intercessors. I mentioned the College of Prayer and wondered about the integration of international ministries with the College of Prayer. This is going to have to be an ongoing conversation because as of right now there is no clear understanding of what this could look like. Right now the only way the College of Prayer is integrated is that leaders who are stateside go over short-term and lead sessions and then return to the states. I am called to be on the foreign ground long term, so this sort of integration wouldn't do for me.I want to be involved in a ministry of intercession on the field. but we have no idea what that would look like. So, there is hope for future discussion concerning this. however, I was advised that in the next few months I really need to pursue the College of Prayer and find out as much as I can, become more familiar with them, be in contact with them about their vision and see what doors God could open and if there is a way to integrate the two.

So, with all of this said, basically I have decided to step into a vast sea of more questions. :) But at least I am swimming in the sea now, and not just standing along the shore wondering what the sea is like.
I can definitely use A LOT of people praying for me in this, so if you want to pray contact me and ask how you can be partnering in this with me. :)

Thanks so much for all of your support,love and prayers over the last few months...we are just beginning in this wild adventure with God...it's exciting to see how it will all unfold.

Update

I just wanted to inform all of you that I went into yesterday's deadline for my decision with the desire to express honestly that I still am not 100% sure. I explained some of the questions I need to have answered and asked if there would be anyway to have an extension of time. I sense that God really wants me to continue to persevere in prayer concerning this and to believe that He'll answer. So, my director will be returning on Tuesday of next week and i plan on having a phone conversation with him. My prayer is that some other things will unfold before then which will make the conversation quite productive. Keep praying...there seems to be much that God has to teach me through this.

The River

Last night at small group, my friend Rebecca shared something from Ezekiel 47. Ezekiel is being shown a vision of the temple area, and this particular passage refers to the river that is flowing from the entrance of the temple. This is what is says, "As the man went eastward with a measuring line in his hand, he measured off a thousand cubits and then led me through water that was ankle-deep. He measured off another thousand cubits and led me through water that was knee-deep. He measured off another thousand and led me through water that was up to the waist. He measured off another thousand but now it was a river that I could not cross, because the water had  risen and was deep enough to swim in-a river that no one could cross. He asked me, "Son of man, do you see this?" Rebecca explained that the Lord spoke to hear about this river flowing from the temple of God being the presence of God that is available to us...some are only experiencing it up to their ankles, but there is more...you can go deeper. Wading in ankle deep water is refreshing and it is enjoyable, but  how much more refreshing is it when you get to swim in it!
I just loved that image, because there is more to God's presence than what we are experiencing now. I know for me, I only know the ankle-deep level, but I want to know more, I want to go further. And I think He is using this decision I have to make to show me that there is more to know of Him. That I have not yet been filled to the measure of the fullness of God. I've only just dipped my toes in! So, bring on more of your Spirit Lord! I want to be filled to the measure of the fullness of God!

Seeking after the Jewel Part 1

The Promise

As I embarked on my two day journey in solitude and prayer with the Lord I wasn't sure what God had in store for me. And frankly, though many people gave me the encouragement that God would indeed meet me and show me his path, I secretly doubted. But with the mustard seed sized faith that I had I moved forward with hope that God would indeed show up. Beloved, He did.

I began my days of solitude and prayer by spending time at Tyler State Park basking in the glory of God's creation. It was restful and relaxing, but when I tried to dig my heels into prayer I felt like I came up against a wall...something that wouldn't allow me to move into undistracted communion with the Father. I was a bit discouraged and thought, “man what a way to start off my retreat with the Lord. I'm not sensing his nearness!!!” But thank you to all who were praying specifically against distraction because the Lord answered your prayers in great ways later that evening when I arrived at my retreat location. It was as if I was entering Christ's very own rest that is talked about in Hebrews. Indeed, it was truly satisfying...I was answering the call of Christ to come to His waters, to taste and see that He is good...to partake of the richest of fare. I felt a huge burden just slip right off. I was truly in the refuge of the Living God.
    As I settled into the evening with the Lord, the words “perseverance” kept showing up as I kept reading portion after portion of God's word, receiving the this bread of life. He was encouraging me to keep going, to keep pursuing him, his wisdom and understanding. Perseverance must finish its work so that I would be mature and complete not lacking anything. I think that in times like these, when we seek the Lord, not only for an answer, but genuinely seek His heart and mind He requires perseverance, because he doesn't want us to lack anything. As I was praying and reading he lead me to Proverbs 2: 1-6 which says “My son (daughter in my case), if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding...then you will understand what is right and just and fair-every good path. For wisdom will enter your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.”  So, I my prayer became, “LORD you promised that if I seek wisdom as I would treasure that it would enter my heart and be pleasant to my soul. You promised. For your name's sake I am holding you to your promise. Fulfill it in me.”
    The next morning I awoke to the sun beaming through the cracks of the window blinds. I awoke with expectation in my  heart. I looked up to the ceiling and what I saw made my heart stir and my jaw drop...I whispered “no way.” There before me were mute colors that spilled across the white surface...there before me was a rainbow. I couldn't help but be in awe that God would give me this...that at this moment this image was only for me in response to my prayers before the Lord. I got out of bed and realized that not only was the rainbow on the ceiling right above me but it was also spilling across the wall as well. The rainbow was all around me. God sets the rainbow as the sign for His covenants, the sign of His promise. I heard a whisper in my spirit “I remember my promise.”
    “And God said, 'I now establish my covenant with you...this is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come: I have set my rainbow in the clouds and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth. Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds I will remember my covenant...”

Seeking after the Jewel Part 2

"I will be found..."

In Ephesians Paul is on his knees praying in the power of the Holy Spirit that the church, his brothers and sisters in Ephesus would experience what God has poured out into him. He is on his knees before the Father, desperate that out of the glorious, marvelous, beautiful riches of God they would be strengthened  with power through the Spirit in their inner being. His desire was for the power of the Spirit to begin to move within them, giving strength. He wanted them to grab a hold of faith so that Christ would dwell inside them. 

Stop here for a second. Think about that. 

Having the very Spirit of the Most High God flow in your inner man...do you get this? Do you marvel at this mystery? Are you on your knees in a response of love? Paul prayed that they would be rooted and established(grounded) in His love that they would be filled with power from on high-power to actually grasp how wide and long and high and deeps is the love of Christ and to know this love, to love being loved by God...to know it with a knowledge that surpasses the minds capacity to know...he's talking about a deep spiritual knowledge of the depths of God's love for them. For us. For you. For me. Consider also, for a moment, the fullness of the Triune God. Think about in the Old Testament when God's presence descended upon the Temple...the power, the strength, the beauty of God filling the temple. The fullness of the divine, perfect, holy, lovely, pure, etc etc...this is Christ's desire-that we be consumed with the fulness of God.

    As you read this first paragraph of the blog you will see that what was on God's agenda for me in this retreat wasn't exactly my agenda, and thank goodness for that. He answered prayers that my heart has been praying for years...the work that He did was far deeper than just an answer to the next step in my journey. I don't know if many of you struggle and wrestle with belief that God could indeed have promises ready to be fulfilled in your life; that God could indeed love you as much as He says He does; that His eyes are set upon you...His gaze fixed on you. To have the faith to say with confidence  “I am my Beloved's and He is mine.” The question that resonated in me was deeper than “God, what do I do next?” But instead God had questions to ask me: "Are you made perfect in love? Do you believe? Will you receive my promises?” What God revealed to me was that He wanted me to believe Him. He wanted me to know that He keeps His promises. Out in front of me is the Promised Land, the promised inheritance for those who are in Christ, and the Lord is standing beside me saying “Look, all of this I give to you as an inheritance, in Christ you are given every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places. It is awaiting you to go in and take possession of it. Do you believe me that this is yours? Do you believe? Will you receive it?” And here instead was the decision: Will I be like the people of Israel who lacked the faith that believed God could indeed give them this “promised” land or will I go in by faith and take possession of my inheritance? 

The answer was faith; belief that God is who He says He is. But this faith had to go beyond a conceptual understanding of what a life lived by the Spirit is to look like. It was actually saying, “OK this is what this looks like, but I WANT to experience it, to go further up and further in to the depths of the mysteries of God. I HAVE to, I NEED to.” As Paul said, “To know this love that surpasses knowledge-that I may be filled  to the measure of all the fullness of God.” This is more than knowledge. This is encounter, this is experience.
Christ's desire is for me to know the love of the Father, and to trust in this love. For this love that the Father has for the Son is the very same love that He has for me. Receiving this love does not come naturally, and neither does receiving all of the wonderful blessings of the Spirit that God wants to pour out into those who seek it. His blessings are for those who believe enough to ask for it and to receive it.  And in all of this God was saying “If I say I will do something, do not doubt but believe that I keep my promise. Believe that I will do it. Believe that I love you.”

As of 11:56 pm on Wednesday night I do not have a clear cut answer about this decision that I need to make, but so much more has been made clear to me. I still have before me the choice to take the way of Abraham and move forward out of faith even if I don't know where I am going, or if I am to wait in a season of intentional prayer for the Spirit of God to birth in me a vision for the nation He will send me into. But I am at peace because a freedom in my spirit has been released and the Lord reminded me that not only did he lay the calling to go into the nations to preach the gospel but he also has anointed my life with the calling of an intercessor. He confirmed in my spirit that a big part of my calling to the overseas mission will be to battle in prayer, to intercede and stand in the gap for the nation that he sends me to. Knowing this does bring clarity to what my next step must include. Receiving the confirmation of this in my spirit is more valuable than knowing a “yes” or "no."
I do believe however that I have enough wisdom and understanding from the Lord to go into tomorrow with a plan. Based on what the Lord has revealed to me, I have some questions that I need to be asking that could really help to clarify further. My plan is to be open and honest with my director about what the Lord revealed to me, how I intend to further pursue my call to intercession and what I feel is needed to develop that and a few other questions I have. I am at peace with this.

Yesterday, Longview, Texas received its biggest snowfall that they've seen in over 7 years...it may have been even longer! Most of us honestly didn't think that we'd get that much snow, but when the snow kept coming down and didn't stop until the afternoon of the next day, we became believers. I feel honored to have gotten a chance to experience such excitement among the East Texans as they enjoyed this first big snowfall. When I arrived home from work my roommate immediately approached me and said "it is snowman time. Get on your winter coat and let's go!"

          So, we bundled up and spent the next hour laughing, throwing snow and building, my first ever, "snow diva." I am used to making a "snowman" but according to Audra we were creating a diva. (For those of you who may be wondering what a "diva" is: it's a distinguished female singer...who is a bit sassy.)
It felt good to relax, to throw off the burdens that come with adulthood and ministry, and to become childlike again. The simplest pleasures in life really do bring satisfaction to the soul.

 

  

  

 

          

Thank you God for this wonderful blessing.
I know that many of you who are reading this have over 20 inches of snow in their area and are thinking...yeah right Summer, snow is anything but a blessing. :) Trust me, I know all about that attitude. But here where it is so rare, it truly is like a jewel.
Hope you enjoyed the photos!