Seasons of relentless pursuit

It is the middle of May, which means that I have now been in Texas for 9 months, and that I'm about to head into the "energy depleting" heat of the summertime. The summer heat does in fact take a toll our our bodies and often causes more of a weary feeling, especially in the dense humidity like we experience...but instead of letting this lethargic and weary feeling overtake us, especially spiritually, we want to see God use "heat" similar to the "tongues of fire" image at Pentecost to spur us on toward a fiery zeal to reach into our community. I believe this is what He wants from those who are called His children. Isn't it one of the biggest reasons why we have the filling of the Holy Spirit? So we can receive the power from on high to spread the glory of the gospel of Jesus Christ?

I just got back from an amazing time of community with fellow leaders and believers whose hearts are incredibly passionate about prayer and about spreading the truth of God's redemption. It was a weekend of prayer and soaking in the powerful word of God. Who knew that prayer could be so fulfilling? God must look down on us and wonder why we limit this divine opportunity we have to be in communion with our Father. I heard it said once from Jim Cymbala (the pastor of the Brooklyn Tabernacle in New York City) that God has a banquet table filled with things that will satisfy the soul, with every spiritual blessing from the heavenly places, filled with everything we need for life and godliness, and so much more, and is just waiting to pour it out on us. God says in Isaiah, "Come! Come to me, taste and see that I am good. Come, buy milk and bread without cost! Taste the richest of fare!" It's just waiting for us to come. God is waiting to pour it out over us, but there is one stipulation...we must come to him; abide continually in him and ask for these things in faith. But how hard it seems to be for us to transfer this from the realm of thought to the realm of reality. This has been a lesson that God has kept me in for many years. I feel like I move forward in understanding it, then fall back, then move forward, then fall back. Sigh.

Another brother in the faith, Mike Bickle, from the International House of Prayer spoke a bit on why it seems to be so hard to feel victory in prayer, and this idea is what I took away with as encouragement:
When you begin to sow to the Spirit and devote yourself to a lifestyle of prayer you will experience a season of obedience without joy, a season of discipline without desire, in which you are crying out "LORD! I AM HERE, YOU SAID TO SEEK YOU AND THAT I'LL FIND YOU BUT YOU ARE HIDDEN. LORD! LORD! I'M PRAYING, WHY DO YOU SEEM SO FAR?-(it's what happens when you have to say no to the flesh and yes to the spirit, it's a time of conditioning yourself to the life of the spirit, no longer submitting to the flesh and of stripping yourself of, well, you).....it takes time and devotion but they are only seasons. After these seasons of what seems to be desireless and lifeless prayer but prayers kept in persistence, obedience and discipline you will begin to see a breakthrough in which light bursts forth in prayer, and you begin to feel the stirring of life and abundance...you will begin to encounter what it means to have streams of living water flowing through you, instead of the stagnant, bacteria infested water. He prefaced these thoughts with the reality that it took him two years of relentless prayers that weren't seasoned with desire before he felt the breakthough, but it came, and when it came it transformed his life.
In our culture we are so used to receiving things instantly, but I think God wants to see if we're serious about this lifestyle change..prayer and living by the spirit takes discipline and the hard work of denying "self" before we see the benefits of the fruit.

I'm just encouraged that God seems to still be revealing himself to me, and even more that He's speaking to my soul about his plans for me. It's truly magnificant that God is so close to my heart. For truly, who am I?